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Love and Acceptance

October 6, 2009

Several friends of mine are undergoing major disruptions in their relationship status. I generally make a great sounding board, as do these friends, so several conversations ensued regarding finding the love of your life.

A close girlfriend of mine (Susie) was lamenting a recent mishap with a boyfriend. Though she had only known him a short time, he had declared his affection early on. Susie, though wonderful, is not perfect. She often appears to be WonderWoman, when, in fact, I’ll just say… she’s human. She has her good days and her bad. She has her insecurities like anyone else. And she has her faults, like anyone else. One of those faults… a tendency to be OCD about the way things are done around her house.

After several weeks of dating, Susie let her WonderWoman facade slowly slip away, and had a fit about the wet glasses on the coffee table (yes, that her boyfriend had left there.)  Now Susie doesn’t know exactly how he feels about her after her meltdown. He told her the next day that he wasn’t sure he could handle that side of her. They had the beginnings of love blooming between them, but she’s afraid that she’s squelched them by showing that she’s human.

I tried to console Susie (what good friend wouldn’t), as did Steve.

Steve is another friend who is also undergoing some relationship difficulties. After meeting the woman he thought was the one, she decided she needed him to change… to suit her agenda. He dug in his heels… he has his career path set, is devoted to his family, and is reluctant to give that up… even for her.

Susie was still stressing about her relationship. Her boyfriend was having second thoughts.  Steve said to her … Sweetie, if he can’t love you on your bad days, then he doesn’t deserve you on your good days.”

We all began discussing relationships… first, romantic ones… going back all the way to our first ‘loves’. Then we discussed love. Love in all its forms. After a lengthy (and sometimes hilarious!) discussion of high school antics, and discussion on meeting our parents expectations… We came up with this conclusion…

Humans want to be loved for who they truly are, on their good days, and especially on their bad ones. Who they truly are, deep down, once the Superman and WonderWoman facades have been eradicated.

We want to be loved for who we truly are.

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One comment

  1. The best advice K.C. & I ever got was if you can’t see yourself loving that certain someone for the rest of your life the way they are RIGHT NOW, then it’s probably not gonna be a forever thing.



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